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Ode to Emptiness

26 Dec
Ode to Emptiness
There was a test that I endured ‘bout 15 years ago
I learned, moved on and worked hard for the life that I now know
I haven’t given it much thought but every now and then
I see another person with same challenge to their zen
I’d like to think if I could pass that test then so could they
I try to have faith that they know tomorrow’s a new day
But more and more this term pops up and a voice deep within
Says, “Share your story, share your scars, tell them where you have been”
As much as I don’t feel the need to stroll down memory lane
My conscience tells me there are some who could learn from my pain
And so I’ll tell you of a person I knew long ago
Someone I thought was a loved one but in fact was a foe
It’s only in these recent years that I’ve began to learn
About a certain term that causes empaths great concern
It’s “Narcissist” and in two words, it means “Empty Inside”
Except for all the bad traits such as jealousy and pride
Although I’d like to think that each of us is quite unique
Narcissists are almost clones with minuscule mystique
I’ve read a couple books and watched some ‘gurus’ on the net
And all the commonalities of which they spoke was met
With utter, gobsmacked shock at how identical they are
Narcissists all have the same agenda which will scar
They’re empty so they seek out those who are filled with great passion
While their partner thinks it’s true love, they think it’s simply fashion
Status is what concerns them, what other people think
And that is why their moods can shift as quickly as a wink
There’s no conscience, no voice inside that whispers, “Loyalty”
There is no heart that says, “Let’s walk their path with empathy”
Agenda is how they attempt to fill their empty void
And they don’t care who it leaves scarred, distraught, sad or destroyed
They’re disconnected creatures who use others as supply
And they can move shockingly quick when their victim runs dry
I see so many loving folks struggle with how they feel
I see so many genuine kind souls with this ordeal
I see them question themselves since it can’t be their ex mate
Take it from a survivor: your lost love’s filled with hate
And bitterness, hostility, disgust, distrust and scorn
And they sought out what they don’t have, something with which you’re born
They lack a soul and so they think proximity will help
While “gaslighting” their partner into a mistreated whelp
They’re very clever at it which is why so many want
To get back with tormentor who they think is confidant
I’ll give the same advice as all the gurus give as well:
Walk on, stay away, shut up and steer clear of that hell
‘Cause that is all that waits for you if you try to make peace
Narcissists don’t gain unless another does decrease
You’ll never hear a “Sorry” from them said, but if you do
Listen carefully, look close, and you’ll *feel* it’s not true
Of my own journey I can say that when we spoke years later
The ‘narc’ that I once knew was still a jealous, petty hater
Competitive and still concerned with prestige and esteem
Bragging and obsessed with all things trendy and mainstream
Sad, I thought, and more we spoke, the more it felt like old
Though years change most, for narcissists three decades won’t remold
They’re stuck the way they are, empty and always seeking source
Sucking partners dry and then filing for a divorce
Moving on the same day with no heart mending required
Genuine connections? No dear, that’s not how they’re wired
Some will have a child which they’ll use as their supply
Siphoning the joy from all the apples of their eye
Move on and use your time to find someone who’s more like you
As hard as it may be to trust, here is what I went through:
I chose to let it go and I got busy with my life
I met a girl, I fell in love, and soon made her my wife
We’ve shared a special love for 15 years and every day
I’ve kissed her, hugged her, said, “I love you” and she’s the same way
Every day, my dears, has felt like heaven here on Earth
And maybe that’s because with narcissists, there is no mirth
Maybe it’s because with narcissists, you live in hell
Constantly harassed with doubt and insults as they yell
I do assure you that it’s not normal for one who claims
To love you to bombard you with such hate as they spew flames
Be honest with yourself and show *yourself* love you deserve
Break the chains, burn the bridge and sever that raw nerve
Don’t dwell on what they did or said, there’s more where that came from
To be around such parasites will only leave you numb
Have the faith that you will find someone after your heart
And have the brains to circumvent those who tear you apart
Learn about the beast known as “the narcissist” and then
You’ll recognize their games and will not fall for them again
For more information on narcissism awareness, I highly recommend visiting Quinn Holliday’s Youtube Channel at

Strange Animals

19 Jul

Strange Animals

Strange Animals

I’ve come from a place far away
And travelled many a long day
To study all the animals of Earth

Through time and space I’ve come to say
These creatures seem to be cliche
Exterior is where they place most worth

Don’t get me wrong, the fuzzy ones
They slaughter and place into buns
Are gentle creatures who live simple lives

The ones to watch are those with guns
And knives and tasers which give stuns
It’s on death and destruction this beast thrives

The bipeds who all walk upright
Who lie and cheat and take delight
In holding power over those around

These animals are a strange sight
Many do act so polite
But empathy in countless can’t be found

The women paint themselves to fool
The males and try to make them drool
While men somehow attract with brutishness

They act aloof, detached and cool
Sometimes they’re even hurtful, cruel
Yet somehow with sports cars and pecs impress

I’ve never met a race so blind
Yet all of their thoughts are confined
To what their pupils see, not what they feel

They have five senses, you will find
But four of them have been declined
And only what they SEE to them is real

Fancy clothes and high heel shoes
Washboard abs seem to amuse
Being six feet tall for men is key

Bonding happens over booze
Shallow small talk, banter, schmooze
Love seems to occur when two agree

Many of them seem to praise
A guy called “Christ” whose final days
Were spent in pain without causing a scene

Yet when they encounter malaise
They lack the grace that “Christ” portrays
And say it’s ‘cause he lacked the human gene

I think I must get out of here
These beasts are not as they appear
I’ve never seen such deception before

Bravado spewed from those in fear
Compliments that aren’t sincere
Don’t get me started on their “peace through war”

I think I’ve seen enough by now
They just slaughtered another cow
And pretend that the meat was not alive

Start the engines, lift the bow
And please never, never allow
Another of us to visit this hive

Stamp the Earth as “Quarantine”
And from my first hand findings glean
That is the most strangest world of all

Let’s check back in, say…fifteen
Millennia and in between
Perhaps they’ll learn to love instead of maul


Meiyo’s Quest

10 Mar


Meiyo’s Quest

When Meiyo was but a small boy, his father sat him down
He spoke to his young son with furrowed brow and a grim frown
“Meiyo,” his father began, “the time has come to warn”
He ran a shaking hand through his gray hair and then did mourn

“The time has come to face the fact, the time has come for truth
I’m sorry that this has to come so early in your youth
Listen well and take to heart these words, for though they sear
The wound will heal in time and then your vision will be clear

He took a breath and closed his eyes, then fixed his gaze upon
The innocent young boy who still could view the world as dawn
“Dusk has fallen, my young son, and honor is no more
The concept has now grown to be a much lamented chore”

His father fought back tears and focused, gaze intent and fierce
“Honor’s dead and buried,” but his stark words did not pierce
“This cannot be,” the boy replied and smiled, “I can feel
Its presence still among us, honor lives, it is still real”

The father turned away and waved the boy off with his hand
“I knew that you would be too young to fully understand.
But time will show you I am wise and one day you will see
I will be proven right by selfishness and apathy”

And as the years did pass, Meiyo did search but never found
Proof of honor’s existence, not a glimmer or sound
“Father,” he then said, “I will leave this land and will search
Surely honor must still live, perhaps in a far church?”

“Or maybe in the mountains guarded by the samurai?”
His father slapped Meiyo across the face and thundered, “WHY?”
“Why would you waste all your time when time’s already shown?
Why waste time and effort for something already known?”

Meiyo was silent but his glare spoke volumes, then he walked
Away while father fumed and spat and talked and talked and talked
“If you depart, then don’t come back! You are no son of mine!”
Meiyo tolerated his abuse with grace divine

Though his father had proven that he was quite devoid
Of honor, Meiyo still believed it had not been destroyed
He searched through villages and cities, boroughs, boondocks, towns
And not an ounce of honor was discovered on their grounds

Selfishness and laziness and fear had come to rule
And every time he asked of honor, he was called a fool
“Honor? What is that? A burden! There’s no time for that!
Honor costs far too much sweat!” they told him as they spat

The years went by but Meiyo never gave up, then one day
An elderly woman walked up to him, “Sir, did you say
That you were searching for honor? If so, may I advise
You travel to the mountain and see Kyōshi the Wise”

“Thank you!” Meiyo said and offered what food did remain
Within his bag with gratitude, but woman did abstain
“Thank you, sir, how kind of you, it has been very long
Since I have seen such a gesture, but you’ll need to be strong

For the journey so keep it, all I ask for in return
Is when you find Kyōshi, don’t be shocked by what you learn”
Meiyo bowed and thanked her and he set off towards the peak
He walked until his legs were sore, then walked ‘till they were weak

He walked until they gave out and he collapsed to the ground
And then he clawed with fingers towards that which he was bound
He pulled himself up to the peak and there Kyōshi stood
He kneeled beside Meiyo and pulled back his heavy hood

“Many years have passed since I have seen another soul
What have you come in search of? Tell me, my friend, your goal?”
He poured water on the cracked lips of Meiyo, who then coughed
“Thank you,” Meiyo said weakly, his voice was low and soft

Kyōshi smiled, “Such little strength, and yet you choose to spend
What little does remain on gratitude to a new friend
Save your strength for your question, tell me what you do seek”
Meiyo nodded, then he asked in a voice soft and weak

“Is it true that honor’s dead? Has its time come and gone?”
Kyōshi sat and pondered until the following dawn
“I have the answer that you seek, the answer’s ‘no’ my friend
Though not widespread, the concept has still has not come to an end”

Meiyo asked, “Then where is it? Please point me to the road”
Kyōshi smiled, “How ‘bout I show the source from which it flowed?”
Meiyo sprang to his feet, strength restored, he called “Please do!”
Wise Kyōshi pointed at Meiyo and said, “It’s you”