26 Jul


I had the chance the other day
To shoot a video
The team that came together has
Left me with quite a glow

Actors, singers and the crew
Worked very hard that day
Everyone came to have fun
But one came just for pay

We had the misfortune to have
A Diva on the set
This spoiled brat acted as if
We all owed her a debt

But since I always like to have
An attitude to show
I’m thankful for the things I have
I thought I’d let her know

I’m thankful for the work she’s made
For me when editing
The hours it will take to make
This Diva look something

Like an actress with talent
But it will take much cutting
Her lack of personality
And skill is very jutting

I could forgive the attitude
If she just brought the goods
Unfortunately she stunk worse than
Some bear crap in the woods

Thanks for acting like you didn’t
Want to be on set
For acting like a brat because
You almost broke a sweat

Thanks for not wanting to shoot
The scene we wrote for you
For walking out as “Action!” called
And holding up the crew

Thanks for not seeing how hard
The dancers worked all day
Burning feet on scorching ground
And no complaints to say

Thanks for having no idea
Of what acting entails
For breaking character to check
The status of your nails

Thanks for booking one more gig
Later that same night
And making our schedule
Incredibly tight

So tight that we didn’t have
Time to sit and eat
Rushing the entire day
While you took time to tweet

And what I’m really grateful for
Was how you dragged your ass
For those final shots in which
You showed so little class

As time ticked away so fast
I thought you’d get in gear
But the less time that we had
The heavier your rear

And when I thanked you for your time
And all of your “hard” work
Thanks for being such a cold
Pretentious stuck-up jerk

When I told you how you screwed
The crew with plans you made
Thanks for your selfish response
Of “I gotta get paid”

It’s probably quite obvious
I’m being sarcastic
I’m actually not thankful for
Your Diva-licious schtick

But there is in fact one thing
I am quite grateful for
The inspiration to write this
And spread your Diva lore

To other folks who come across
Your “beautiful” headshot
The camera may show off your looks
But one thing was not caught

Your awful, selfish attitude
That you just cannot hide
Good luck with seeing how many
Others let it slide



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