Tag Archives: pain

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Vicariously

Vicarious: adjective – felt or enjoyed through imagined participation in the experience of others.

vicarious
Vicariously

The athlete wraps his swollen knee
To take the pain down one degree
He puts his uniform on and he stands

He stretches and he grunts and sneers
While in the background thunder cheers
Of fans who have some very high demands

He does some squats and starts to sweat
His knee and shoulder play roulette
Sometimes they stab, sometimes it’s just an ache

He does this every single day
And though the word they use is “play”
He knows that it’s not “fun” that is at stake

He pushes himself to his edge
He sacrifices, makes a pledge
To expect more from himself than of others

He puts on all his gear and walks
Out of the locker room and talks
With his comrades, his teammates and his brothers

But soon they’re all drowned out by fans
Who yell and scream within the stands
Who shout, “We’re gonna win!” with all their might

A man who hasn’t run in ages
Takes a swig of beer and rages
“Show them what we’re made of and go fight!”

The athlete sees another man
Who tries to not spill his beer can
While nachos balance in his other grip

He holds the chips up to his face
And gobbles some without much grace
And with a full mouth thunders, “Let ‘er rip!”

Thousands pack the seats today
To chant, to cheer, to hope, to pray
To live vicariously through the men

Who choose discomfort, struggle, pain
Through snow and sleet and cold and rain
Fans pin their hopes on warriors again

“We’re gonna win!” some slob declares
And athlete does look up and stares
A cold and steely glance because he’s heard

Enough people who act involved
So athlete’s poise becomes dissolved
Because for him it is all so absurd

He says what is on all the minds
Of his teammates as he reminds
The nacho chomping fan it’s not *his* win

Until he puts the nachos down
And hits the gym and goes to town
Which makes his teammates all chuckle and grin

The nacho chomping fan is stunned
He feels betrayed and hurt and shunned
And now he cheers for the opposing team!

Once again he lives through those
Who saw two choices and they chose
Not path of comfort but the one extreme

The athletes all compete and drive
Each other to feel more alive
While fans in stands sit by and feel connected

And cheer and pump their fists with zeal
As if their achievement is real
Vicarious accomplishment injected

They all go home and feel quite spent
“Man, what a game!” one does lament
“We gave them everything we had out there!”

The athlete shakes his head and limps
His way past all the oafs and wimps
And then collapses down into a chair

He slowly pulls the knee wrap off
The pain hits him and makes him cough
“WE won jack shit” he mumbles quietly

“The victory is for my team
No matter much you all scream
And how much you live vicariously”

                             ~Miro
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Sting

sting

Based on a true story…

Sting

A man called me to ask for help
The other day at work
He asked, “You like this crappy weather?”
Surely with a smirk

“Yes,” I said with no emotion
“I enjoy rough things
With struggle and with discomfort
And with whatever stings

And pains and tears and hurts us, we
Are brought more strength and grace”
He asked if I was kidding but
He could not sense a trace

Of sarcasm or humor in
My voice so then he said,
“How old are you?” and I replied
“36 years I’ve tread”

He laughed and dismissed,
“Oh that’s why, you’re still just a young pup”
And so to show him age means nothing
I then caught him up

“I’ve been hurt bad and am in pain
I’ve lost job and my house
And worst of all, I had to watch
My loving, graceful spouse

Endure the worst pain there could be
When we found out our child
Would never take its first breath,
Yes, I’m young but I’ve complied

More pain and struggle, misery
And loss in my short years
Than many grey-haired people have
In their longer careers”

He sadly said “I’m sorry” but
I replied “I am not
It’s all these things that I’ve endured
That strengthened, sharpened, taught

Imbued with patience, wisdom, grace
And showed me the true way
That is why it is no lie
Whenever I do say

That I enjoy the challenge, struggle
Discomfort and rigor
It’s all these things that awaken
That inspire, that trigger

The Warrior that was dormant
To pound chest and to roar
To rise to the occasion and
To take a little more”

All that he could say was that
He liked my attitude
I asked him what he thought of all
The snow that chilled his mood

He changed his mind and said that it
Was not so bad in fact
“No,” I said, “There are worse things
That cause greater impact”

Before he left, I asked him just
How old he was as well
“54” he said, then I
Inquired, “How much hell?”

“Not as much as you,” he said
So I replied, “Well then
If you are lucky, struggle will
Appear and bring you Zen

And only then will you see that
The years don’t mean a thing
Rather, it’s what you survive
The hurt, the pain, the sting”

                               ~Miro

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Compensate

compensate

Compensate

“All or nothing” is a way
Of thinking that will lead
To nothing more than standing still
If you have just one speed

As years go by the damage will
Take toll on a few parts
But when a limb is lost, that’s when
The intensity starts

And heightened training  on surviving
Limbs must then be done
If something is wrong with your arm
Your task is then to run

If knees are shot or ankles ache
Then get yourself a bench
Realize your arms still work
And can be used to clench

And lift and throw around dead weight
And get your life blood flowing
If atrophy attacks one part
Then others must be growing

Compensate, don’t sit and cry
About what doesn’t work
Don’t focus on injury
‘Cause healthy parts you’ll shirk

Warriors will find a way
To push themselves as far
Physically as they can go
No matter what does mar

They’ll run or walk with neck and back
And shoulder injuries
They’ll exercise their abs and chest
Despite their blown-out knees

They are aware of what remains
And let go of what’s gone
So that the healthy parts increase
In endurance and brawn

                                        ~Miro

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Be Selfless

Be Selfless

I know it’s hard to just forgive
To say “Oh well, live and let live”
To do the right thing, let go and move on

I know the hurt they did to you
Feels like it cut and stabbed right through
To your heart and now you feel so withdrawn

And even though you know what’s right
You feel you just don’t have the might
To free that heavy burden from your soul

My word of advice isn’t to
Be nice or polite to those who
Steal joy and on your peace exact great toll

My only request: Be selfless
Don’t think of self and all your stress
‘Cause stress occurs just if ego resides

Hurt feelings and torment are
The evidence ego’s not far
It’s in that constant hurt that ego hides

Be selfless, think not of your pain
And more you’re selfless, more you train
The more you do not take things personal

The more you’ll see the deception
That ego has on perception
And soon from your eyes you will pull that wool

There is no way to rectify
The wrong things done that make you cry
And angry, hurt, frustrated and so sad

There’s no redemption for some deeds
And their ego rarely concedes
So be selfless or it will drive you mad

Be selfless and don’t keep score
Stop saying how they made you sore
Be selfless ‘cause it’s selfishness that makes

All the hurt and all the scorn
So be selfless and sound the horn
And witness how within spirit awakes

                                          ~Miro

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Atrophy

“Man is not made for defeat. A man can be destroyed, but not defeated.” ~Ernest Hemingway

atrophy

Atrophy

Atrophy, the shrinking of
The muscles that you’ve built
Body parts that once were stern
Now droop, deflate and tilt

It sometimes feels like tossing water
Out a sinking boat
With just a tiny bucket and
Soon you won’t be afloat

It’s difficult to keep training
When all you do is weaken
Duty is what serves as my
Eternal guiding beacon

You do the best you can with what
You have to work with, friends
And so I push myself as much
As I can while strength ends

I run as fast as I can even
Though endurance fades
I lift a fraction because my
Power of old evades

But every day when I lay down
I know I did my best
The atrophy can’t stop me from
Beating upon my chest

A broken Warrior but still
A Warrior no less
I’m not defined by the weight that
I lift on the bench press

I’m not defined by the time that
It takes to run a mile
I am defined by all the pain
I endure with a smile

I am defined by how much I
Can do with shrinking frame
And it’s always the maximum
And for that, there’s no shame

                                     ~Miro

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Dark and Quiet

Dark & Quiet

This message is more specific
Than most that I do write
It’s directed at people who
Wage a similar fight

It’s for those who are dealing with
A chronic kind of pain
Physical in body or
Emotional in brain

I’ve managed to reintegrate
Myself in the workforce
After years of having my
Ailments take me off course

I was not able to pick up
Exactly where I’d left
Some factors had to be tweaked and
Conditions made bereft

When one is constantly in pain
Your senses grow intense
Making things a bit darker
Serves as a good defense

The normal lighting tubes above
Which most will pay no mind
Over prolonged hours cause
Fatigue is what I find

And so I’ve made an effort to
Keep man-made light around
Dimmer than normal in order
To feel much less wound

Darkened lenses on my glasses
Also help to serve
To block excessive lighting in
Which plucks the painful nerve

Yes, some will look at you strange
Or say, “You think you’re cool?”
But to me, he who worries of
Such things is the real fool

The other factor that has helped
Is to keep the noise low
I’ve made an effort to stay clear
Of those who do bellow

And speak more loudly than is needed
All that extra noise
Over time will only serve
To erode all your poise

The truth is that most people talk
Far more than is required
And I have learned that excess only
Leads to getting tired

I choose my actions carefully
And made what I have last
And that applies to talking when
I’m contacted or asked

It isn’t necessary to
Just yammer on all day
And being one who has learned this
I like to stay away

From those who have no concept of
“Enough” because they just
Serve to be another pain
That is upon me thrust

Dark and quiet’s how I work
And where my peace does thrive
Dark and quiet’s how this broken
Vessel does survive

You cannot stop your body from
Breaking down, but you can
Change your outside factors and
Devise a fitting plan

To work around what holds you back
But you must have the guts
To make accommodations even
If they’ll think you’re nuts

                                    ~Miro

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YOU Are The Problem

YOU Are The Problem

This message goes to anyone
Who struggles with a vice
And thinks that outside factors are
At fault, YOU should think twice

Do not blame your shortcomings
On anything but YOU
It’s time YOU took a moment from
Complaining to review

That YOU’re the one who isn’t trying
Hard enough to make
Your situation any better
And deal with your ache

YOU’re the one who lets others
Get all under your skin
That hands over the power to
Others who deal chagrin

YOU’re the one who isn’t trying
Hard enough to break
Bad habits, to realize
Giving in’s a mistake

YOU can’t blame the weather or
Blame the economy
It doesn’t take a microscope
To be able to see

That most things wrong in your life are
Because of YOU and how
YOU sit and play passenger
And constantly allow

Stressing factors to control
Your mood, your joy, your fear
Take a look in the mirror
And the real problem’s clear:

A person who can take control
But chooses to sit back
And hopes that things will get better
And prays to God for slack

The problem won’t be solved until
The person in the mirror
Leans a little closer and
Sees themselves a bit clearer

Sees the dormant Warrior
That’s sleeping deep inside
Realize the Creator
Already did provide

Everything that YOU need to
Conquer all of your fears
All of your frustrations and
Explore all new frontiers

Awake that fighting spirit deep
Inside YOU and YOU’ll see
The Warrior within YOU will
Proceed to set YOU free

Of all of your temptations and
Your shortcomings, your flaws
YOU’ll find that where before YOU ran
Your Warrior now draws

Strength from situations that
Would usually just drain
Everything’s a challenge to be
Conquered, even pain

Let the spirit of your Warrior
Awake and solve
The root of the problem and all
Your vices will dissolve

                            ~Miro

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Developing Discipline

Developing Discipline

How does one develop, raise
And strengthen discipline?
Self-restraint, the power to
Control, endure, to win?

Discipline is key to conquering
So many vices
But cost of discipline is the
Unlikeliest of prices

Discipline is not “gotten”
It’s already possessed
It is a trait with which you were
From birth already blessed

But it is buried underneath
The pleasures and the bliss
When it is time to have some fun
It’s what folks do dismiss

“How do I get disciplined
Like you?” some folks will ask
“You don’t get disciplined,” I say
“There’s no training or task

Discipline is what is left
When other things are lost
Discipline comes with great pain
Suffering and exhaust”

It is uncovered when your shoulders
Feel like great big spikes
Are stabbing, twisting into them
Two sudden lightning strikes

You learn just how much discipline
You have when both your knees
Are weak and you feel that you could
Be knocked down by a breeze

Your discipline is not a choice
But comes quite automatic
When you have had a few too many
Things that were dramatic

Happen in your life, the loss
Of parents, friends, a child
Losing these pieces of you
Keep you from getting riled

The trials of life will chip away
Like sculptor with a stone
It chips away at all the flesh
And meat ‘till it hits bone

And that is where your discipline
Resided all along
The iron will enabling
To be graceful and strong

*Loss* is the “big secret” to
Discovering that power
It doesn’t matter how many
Great books that you devour

It doesn’t matter how many
Great mentors instruct you
Discipline is not something
You get, gain or accrue

Maybe when you lose your health
You’ll stop having that smoke
Maybe when your heart’s diseased
And you’re told soon you’ll croak

You’ll have the discipline to eat
Foods much lower in salt
And have the strength to abstain from
The things which are at fault

Maybe when you’ve lost much more
Than most people endure
All the things which you’re addicted
To will lose allure

Wish you luck with conquering
Those vices that you fight
May you endure great loss and then
Finally see the light

                              ~Miro

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The Wretch

“Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.” ~Jim Morrison

The Wretch

There once was a pathetic wretch who got an injury
To get away from chronic pain was his one constant plea
The shooting pain turned him into a sour, sorry grouch
All he wanted to do was to lay down on the couch

He whined and cried and wanted all to feel sorry for him
He thought they did not understand how arduous and grim
That each and every single day had become in his life
No one understood, not friends, not family, not wife

He searched for help but no one seemed to be able to aid
Even the good Lord above was silent when he prayed
But then one day he encountered one with no sympathy
Who understood him well and proceeded to shake his tree

While many said, “So sorry” and they tried in vain to help
This Warrior he spoke to looked at him like a small whelp
This Warrior would not listen to all of his complaining
She made it clear to him that what it took was intense training

She closed the door on his dream of living his life pain free
She did explain that it was something he would never see
She called him on his bullshit and she told him who he was
She told him that managing pain is what a Warrior does

She told him, “It’s a part of you” and to step up and own
That it was now ingrained in him as much as flesh and bone
That he needed to embrace it as he embraced the rest
That it was something not to be loathed, hated or repressed

“Feel, accept, control, conquer, repeat when it is needed”
She looked at him with no remorse, he thought she was conceded
It burned how little sympathy she showed and made him feel
Like he was a pathetic wretch who liked to moan and squeal

He walked away from that meeting surprised and quite offended
But shortly after that he pondered and he comprehended
The cold, calm look upon her face had haunted him for days
It was the look of strength and truth in that Warrior’s gaze

She didn’t dance around his feelings or mince what she said
And she was the only person whose words rang in his head
The well wishes and thoughts and prayers went in and out one ear
But something about her delivery had shown no fear

The look upon her face he now thought back and did discern
She’d faced the same battle and now her Warrior eyes did burn
She came upon the same problem and made the choice to own
And that was why to his complaining she could not be prone

She knew it was not such a beast, that he was stronger than
Anything that ailed him but because he turned and ran
She saw him as pathetic for making the coward’s choice
No longer could he disagree with her Warrior voice

He stopped complaining of the painful hand that had been dealt
He left the groaning out when he spoke about how he felt
He kept a straight face and he clutched his pain close to his chest
“Thank you, Lord” he said to God, “I do feel very blessed”

Every single time he felt a stabbing, aching pain
He suited up and prepared to do battle with his brain
He fought and survived every time and grew in confidence
And since he learned great self-control, he did not take offense

Whenever someone else attacked, to him, another pain
To be endured with grace and strength on his life-long campaign
Of managing, not getting rid of all the things that hurt
He learned that the key was to face, not to run and avert

He was so thankful to that Warrior who told him straight
Who made him feel he was pathetic and made him irate
Now a Warrior, he did admit that she was right
He had become a wretch ‘cause of his chronic, painful plight

And since he did embrace the painful truth that she had spoke
No longer did he feel like a pathetic, sad jamoke
He did become a Warrior Poet who then did write
Wise words which at times offended, stung and did incite

But always had a theme which most were able to infer:
All the things that hold you back, discourage and deter
Are things that you can embrace, face and take ownership for
You have the strength within to fight that never-ending war

                                                                  ~Miro

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Taking It

“So we’ll hunt him, because he can take it.” ~Commissioner Gordon

Taking It

He tries to round
A corner on
His cycle but
He lacks the brawn

A stinging stab
Twists in his side
That’s amplified
By his new ride

He clenches teeth
To hold the pose
Stretched on pod
Away it goes

He knows that this
Is going to hurt
But there is no way
To avert

He yanks real hard
And the pod turns
All throughout
His body burns

He wonders how
He takes so much
How he survives
The constant clutch

How he can even
Be awake
How he can take
And take and take

So much punishment
And pain
How has he
Not gone insane?

He chuckles and thinks
Of the mask
And cape he wears
When on his task

And maybe he
Is just a bit
Insane right now
He does admit

But lack of sanity
Is not
What all of this
Turmoil has brought

All the beatings
All the hate
All the fear
The heavy weight

Is all because
He can take it
It’s all because
He’ll never quit

The sirens are
Now closing in
He pulls back and
Makes the pod spin

He loses the
Pursuers down
A dark alley
Just outside town

He powers down
And slowly gets
Up off the pod
And feels the sweats

His body trembles
Hands are numb
Can’t make a fist
A broken thumb

The pounding in
His head won’t stop
He falls and on
The ground does flop

The sirens now
Are far away
But will come back
Another day

He slowly breathes
And takes it all
Back to the pod
He starts to crawl

He mounts again
And grits his teeth
And seeks a refuge
Underneath

A dark and quiet
Place where he
Can feel at rest
And just be free

Of taking it
A cave somewhere
That he does not
Have to beware

He rides into
The forest and
He rides across
The dark, cold land

And comes up to
An opening
To a dark place
Where he’ll be king

He slowly rides
Into the cave
And a new path
With pod does pave

He stops and looks
And feels at home
He gets off and
He starts to roam

He starts to feel
His strength arise
As he pulls off
His black disguise

He sits down and
Recoups so that
Tomorrow he can
Be the bat

That takes it all
That they may throw
Regardless if
It’s friend or foe